Injuries on the Mind and Body

I started writing this post 13 days from the start line of the Morro Bay triathlon and as I wrote this post I became more and more nervous for my race. Not to mention, I put off finishing this post due to hoping that I could put the negative thoughts of my injury behind me and feel better. I am nursing a broken toe. How does one stay positive and motivated when they are not able to run/bike due to injuries? 

I broke my toe in Japan while I was doing an open water swim. I was walking through the water to get out on the island, when crunch and sting. I thought initially I had just scrapped my toe bad on the coral, along with stubbing it pretty good. I cleaned up my toe and went about swimming. While running on the beach, I kept having shooting pain through my toe, up into my foot. I continued running, figuring it was due to hitting the toe and that I would just push through the pain to get in a swim and a run. Right? Stubbed toes hurt for awhile and then they get better. 

After, getting back on the bus to head back to my friends place; walking was getting more and more painful. I iced the toe and foot when we got back and noticed I had quite a bit of swelling and noticed that there was some color changes. I figured that since I had stubbed it pretty bad, it was going to bruise and most likely be just a bruised bone/toe. Throughout the rest of my trip, I had increasing swelling and my entire side of my foot turned black and blue. Mind you I am a paramedic; so I ignored all the signs and continue to believe I just stubbed my toe. My friends on the trip all agreed that I had broke my toe, but I was hoping that things would start feeling better by the time I got home to start training hard. 

No such luck though, it became official and broken toe was the diagnosis. I kept buddy taping, ice and elevation, along with some ibuprofen; helped reduce the pain; but running and squeezing my foot into my cycling shoes was out of the question. The first week back home, swimming was even painful kicking through the water. Pull buoy was the name of the game. It had been 4 weeks since breaking the toe and was told mostly likely I would be able to start running and cycling. After about 3 miles, my foot and toe start hurting and I start getting pains up through my ankle and calf. The initial squeeze into by cycling shoes, puts a fair amount of pressure on the toe, but luckily I can get in a decent ride before the side of my foot starts hurting. 

I had been following R.I.C.E principles to a T; giving my toe and foot a break to allow for a more rapid healing process, but I felt all the endurance and muscle I had built up; dwindling away. I was back into training more after feeling that the injury was improving, but felt that I was going to be dying during the race due to the lost time. Not to mention, I couldn't help thinking that I was not going to do very well race day - like maybe not finish because of the loss in strength and endurance. I do not give up on anything, but after those last few weeks, I was terrified to go to the race and wind up last. I had never read much in Sports Psychology, but I had learned now would be the best time to focus on some of my psychology of my injury and what it was doing to myself.

Positive thoughts and imagery. Sports Psychology states that these tactics will benefit you in getting through any injury and help you stay motivated and positive. I found myself asking these questions and having thoughts of: "I am by no means going to get the time I wanted."; "I will be lucky to cross the finish line and not be DNF."; "Is it even worth still going?". I tried to change these thoughts, by thinking I still had almost 2 weeks of healing until race day and everyday the pain would get better and 3 miles could turn into 6 miles of running. I tried focusing on that feeling of seeing the Finish Line coming into focus and being able to run. 

I am still working on positive thoughts and positive imagery but it is something that is going to take time to master. What I have found through this injury, is learning that my mind can play bigger games on me than an injury actually plays. Yes, I had lost some of my endurance and strength; but I had lost so much more in letting this injury get into my head. It clouded my head on what I was actually capable of and most likely impacted me more than I thought on race day. Along with physical training, I plan to incorporate more psychological training into my everyday routine. Strong mind = strong body.